in the past few weeks, the weather has been annoyingly unpredictable: peak-of-summer sunny radiance in the morning, then sad, gray rains in the afternoon. i'd have much rather preferred real rain, with big, fat droplets that apologize for nothing, than this shy, slothful pouring.

this morning, the day being the droopy kind described above, i was rushing to catch a cab to work (like i usually do, oh, about three times a week).

i saw kyle again playing outside, his yaya nearby. he's the little boy i mentioned in a previous post. i haven't seen him in weeks. and he's not so little anymore. but his eyes are still adorably small, and his hair still fell straight and heavy like that Dutch Boy drawing.

i never saw him holding toys before. but now, he has obviously graduated into more "mature" toys, like plastic armalites. you should have seen him terrorizing this poor cat that looked strangely like a cousin of our Boy Astig.

as adults are wont to do when there are little ones around, i made a face. and mockingly berated him for "shooting" said cat as i was running to look for a cab.

he turned around and pointed his gun at me, half-skipping, half-runnning as he tried to chase and "shoot" me at the same time, face deadly intent.

it was difficult but i outran him, laughing as i slid inside Lulu Love TWX 631 and hearing his toy gun rattling arrogantly in the background.

and in my head there's a beatles song that's playing, something with the words "here comes the sun...little darlin'..."

(from August 23, 2006)

little flower makes my view of the aircon, dusty balcony and even dustier street much prettier :)

when it comes to my addiction for books, i would have to say that the past few months have been spectacular. i never thought i could measure achievement in pages...

ever since we were kids, and especially when i started buying books on my own with saved-up allowance money, my sister always teased me about my collection. she often said i'd probably have a library someday.

when i started working, it couldn't be helped that i get some slack for my book-buying habits. better nga naman kung pagkain na lang, di ba? though i did argue to death that i always got those books on sale...

sooo, i am very happy to say that i am now on my way to curbing my impractical bibliophile tendencies. what i could have bought, i've borrowed. yes, i still can't help but browse through sale bins when they're oh-so-surreptitiously available (it's a conspiracy, i tell you), but, But, BUT i have learned to be so much more discerning before spending even P20 on a bargain book. when i was a kid, a visit to a 2nd-hand bookstore would never be complete without a P100-yield, roughly 4-10 books then; and i also once spent a whopping P7,000 at a book fair.

Now, I can pass by a discount display, check out a few titles, read at least five separate pages, and if i didn't like it, i wouldn't buy it. i know this is probably regular for most of you, but i dunno, it makes me feel like such a winner. it's like i have literary taste or something... ;-)

killing the shopping bug was easy, and refraining from buying CDs was tougher (despite the practicality of el torrente and the mp3), but this... it's like going full circle. books were my very first love and i'm learning how to make this relationship work without hurting any one of us, ensuring that we'll be part of each other's lives for much, much longer :)

...so the e-heads concert had to be cut for ely's health reasons. damn. i was so looking forward to this. ah, well.

    i'm glad the promoters and the band explained it in such a good way, though. i was actually surprised that no one in the thousands-strong crowd boo-ed. poor ely. it must have been something to see such a huge crowd turn out for his old band. hope he's okay.

LeRoi Moore, saxophonist of my one and only Dave Matthews Band, has died unexpectedly of complications from an ATV accident that happened last June.

i have never seen them live. and now he's dead. i am so seriously sad. i want to cry. i don't want to believe this has happened. sorry, drama. but it's LeRoi. DMB won't be the same. i don't know what to say or do or think. i am grieving over a musician who helped form a big part of who i am. #41, still my favorite song in the world now, won't be the same, ever.

it's on my list of life dreams to see them live...

i will go in this way, and find my own way out... why won't you run into the rain and play? let the tears splash all over you.

rest in peace, o dreadlocked one. thank you. Thank You. THANK YOU. for making music that matters and saves lives.

yes, gurgle not gargle...

* my mom's birthday tomorrow :) we're cooking things and such. i hope the titos and the titas come. that's all she wants.

* three quarters into Breaking Dawn is the wrong thing to read right now

* been thinking a lot about loyalty lately (oh heeey, how's that for alliteration? ;-) ). i realize i'm not the best person to rail against the disloyal, but some people really will disregard things for the sake of convenience. i wonder if anyone has ever DIED of inconvenience. the cancer in this society is more than just its politics. a great factor is laziness--the short cut, the band-aid, anything that will make it easier on you even if it's not right. kamote.

* what do you do when life presents so many shiny new things, but so very few changes?

* planning a surfing trip to good ol' LU next weekend (aug. 23 to 25). join na! i ranted some days ago re: not really liking my brain at the moment, like it doesn't know how to just be settled anymore. my thinking is getting increasingly frantic.  i need to get away to clear my head. that particular beach always does it. i can't wait for the chance to just be able to concentrate on one beautiful objective :)

* bellydance has started again. diyosa jill is teaching us a tribal choreography now. wheee! sama na kayo dali! teacher by 40, teacher by 40, teacher by 40...

da, that's it.

fangirling. sharing. reviewing soon. have a listen and i'm sure you'll want to get your own copy. best tracks: Falling Slowly, When Your Mind's Made Up, Gold, The Hill, Fallen from the Sky, Leave and Say It to Me. *hikbi*

because i did not have a digicam with video function last june 28...thanks to whoever uploaded this. makati ave girls look! a complete esma yalli!

it is yet to stop.

today, while the boys were discussing the latest Wimbledon scores and the Williams sisters, N said, "ay, women's finals ng Wimbledon ba yon? i thought i was watching Gorillas in the Mist."

and from a bad commentator that says "I can't really identify among the two gorillas, but Gorilla A, also known as the bigger gorilla, is blah blah blah. Gorilla B, meanwhile, is hanging on."

and then to a classic Nat Geo wildlife docu in night vision with matching whispered voiceover: "at this point, it's very dangerous to approach these animals (athletic grunt). see, those sounds they are making means agression and they are currently feeling very very territorial," "look at Gorilla B stalking her prey very very carefully. let's stay quiet so they don't see us."

ah, basta, i find it funny.

yesterday, we were all busy writing at around 4pm when N opened the window to let some air in, and sat down again to work. N was looking at the window when he exclaimed to the whole room, "Hey, are those niggers?". Of course, it's a politically incorrect joke but we couldn't help but laugh. G suggested that we call them and say, "Hey you, come closer... here's a dime." And then we gave them names. I suggested "Jamal".

So, yeah, yesterday was peppered with bad racist humor and it was one of the funniest afternoons I've had lately. Sorry, tao lang. Don't worry, hanggang doon lang naman yon. Y'all had to be there =D

KB, Katch and I are trying to get used to dancing in heels :) hee hee!